There’s no kids involved! She’s not giving you or making you feel like she even cares if you stay or go! You’re not feeling the attraction nor the emotions you should with someone! If it’s gone it’s gone! Nothing you can change. If you truely feel like it is gone and you have put all effort into it and so has she then you have to walk away. Haev you ever talked with her about your feelings and asked her how she felt about the two of you? That might be a good start for you.

In my case, I had kids involved. I struggled for years. I actually wanted out before we had kids but I thought it would fix things. The situation you are in with your marriage right now was probably the same I was in for the last 2+ years. We didn’t talk much. We didn’t say I love you. We didn’t have sex. We both struggled. Finally, one day I just went to him and said, I can’t do this anymore. We both cried, talked, cried some more. We even still stayed together for awhile until I came home one day and told him that I had found myself an apartment. We stayed married actually for 2 yeras even after I moved out….just in case we could work it out. We’re the best of friends now, but we kinda have to for the kids sake!

In my opinion, it sounds like your wife is feeling the exact same way as you are: Lost – Numb – and confused. So I suggest, start with talking to her. A nice civil talk not a yelling, bashing, cursing match, a civil talk.

I hope you didn’t go visit the “other woman” for the simple fact, you don’t need any further confusion right now. Focus on you and your wife and the next steps for the both of you guys.

And same as Ranna – Here for ya man!

And the other woman? Did you go see her? If you did how did that go? IF you didnt congrats on being strong in what I know is a very hard spot.

I admire you for not just up and leaving your wife, but in the same aspect don’t stay just out of guilt over the affair. It’s not worth it to either of you or the other woman in this case.

You need to find out what you want!
Here for you as always!

How did you go? Did you resist?

What a scary place you are in. I’ve been there. Pulled myself back (still not entirely sure why..), but there you go.

Hang in there…