Decision made easy…

I am pretty disappointed this morning. Pretty mad and a bit hurt. No response to my email, not even a hello I ‘m back, how you doing.

So the decision made been made for me and it’s no surprise. I know the situation was too much for her and I and knew she wanted out of it. She made the smart decision. I was to emotionally involved and didn’t want to cut the ties.

Tonight I will go see her a tell her goodbye. No talking. No kissing. I just going to say I won’t be able to come see her anymore for awhile until I can get over her. Seeing her won’t be easy.

I know just have to deal the initial haertache and work on getting over her. Not going to see her will make it easier.

On a side note, women’s intuiton is a scary thing. My told me last night she had a bad dream that I was in love with someone else, but didn’t want to tell her. I guess my feeling and actions were telling, although I was trying hard for them not to be.

It almost seems like a cruel joke by someone. “Let’s take 2 people who have no chance of being together and make them fall in love with other and see what happens” Not very funny.

I appreciate everyone’s comment on this. It really did mean a lot to me. I’ll stop being such a wuss now and start blogging on another topic. Just another scar on my beat-up heart. Time to move on…….thanks. 

I appreciate everyone’s comments on this subject. It really meant a lot to me. I’ll stop being such a wuss  

Impatient….

Sitting around stewing in my own juices is driving me crazy and I am expending to much energy.  I simply can’t wait to get things off my chest. 

So I composed and email to the “other” I expressed pretty much everything that was going through my head. And I sent it. Now I will have to just wait for the response.

I need to know what her thoughts and feelings are, this is not a casual play anymore, for me anyway.

Feel alot better now and can focus on other things. 

Bite the Bullet…Grin and bear it!

I have come to a decision. sigh!

I have to end it will the other girl. It’s just way to complicated. I can’t handle it, my head hurts.

So now what I feared most will happen. I am in love and have to say good by to that. I have to go back and mope around in my current relationship and face a life mediocraty and knowing she is out there and will be with someone else.

I have to tell the other sometime soon. This will not be good.

Is there something you can take to make the pain in my chest and knot in my gut go away? And being able to stop thinking of her would be nice too. I can’t breathe when I think of her. 

not looking for sympathy…just an ear

I find myself in the most undesirable situation. Because of it’s nature I can turn to any of my friends for advice or just to get things off my chest.

Here it goes….. it’s gets a bit complicated.

I was married in 2005 to a great girl. Smart, funny, together, loves me. Unfortunately without even looking I fell in love with someone else. It’s not just lust.  It’s heads-over-heels, lightening strike, where have you been all my life type of thing for both of us.

Everyday is so painful for me. Of course there is the guilt of what I am doing to my wife. The other girl is also married, but separated and has just started a new relationship, so she is lying also.

I don’t know what in the hell to do! The girl I am seeing is not to happy about our situation and says it should end, it’s obviously a bad thing we are doing, but it seem neither of us can walk-away.

I can’t image hurting my wife and I can’t image letting the potential love of my life go?

Right now I am going through of phase of not talking or meeting the other girl and it’s killing me. It’s only been 3 days.